How Parents Can Raise a Good Child

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Many parents focus their attention on their child’s grades and extracurricular activities, such as making sure they study, do their homework, and get to soccer practice or dance lessons on time. But too often, we forget to devote the time and effort to cultivating another component of our child’s success and development — an equally important, and perhaps even more necessary component — becoming a good.

It can be easy to forget the importance of resisting the pervasive messages of instant gratification, consumerism, and selfishness that are pervasive in our society.

If we want to raise children to be truly kind people, we can help guide our kids into habits and behaviors that promote positive character traits such as kindness, generosity and empathy towards those less fortunate or those in need.

As CS Lewis famously said, “Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.” How can we raise a good child, one who will do the right thing, even when no one can see them do it, and when there may be no reward? While there’s no guaranteed formula (if any!), here are some ways parents can build a good character and help their child grow into a good person.

Cultivate empathy in your child

Emotional intelligence and empathy, or the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and consider their feelings and thoughts, is one of the most basic traits in a good person. Studies have shown that having a high emotional quotient – that is, being able to understand one’s own emotions and the emotions of others – is an important element of success in life.

To encourage empathy in your child, encourage them to talk about their feelings and make sure they know that you care about them. When a conflict occurs with a friend, ask her to imagine how her friend might feel and show her how to manage her emotions and work hard to resolve them.

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Encourage them to elevate others

Although stories of children engaging in bullying and other bad behavior often stir up public opinion, the truth is that many children quietly perform good deeds in the normal course of life. whether it’s making a friend feel better when he’s down or joining a community center.

When you’re encouraging positive behaviors, like doing something to make someone’s day better (even something as small as patting a friend on the shoulder when they’re sad), be sure to talk about the positive effects. negative impact that behaviors such as gossip or bullying have on both sides. (both those who are bullied and those who commit the act of bullying), why and how it hurts people.

Teach them to be volunteers

Whether your child helps an elderly neighbor by shoveling the sidewalk or helps you pack some canned goods to donate to family homes, volunteering can shape your child’s personality. friend. When children help others, they learn to think about the needs of those less fortunate than them and can feel proud of themselves for making a difference in the lives of others.

Offer rewards sparingly

An important thing to remember when encouraging children to help others is not to reward them for every good deed. That way, your child won’t associate volunteering with do-it-yourself and will learn that feeling good about helping others is a reward in itself.

That’s not to say you shouldn’t take your kids out from time to time to enjoy a special treat or give them a gift for helping others AND for working hard and studying hard.

Children love encouragement and thrive with parental approval. Occasionally, a reward is a great way to show him that you’re grateful for the good things he does.

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Teach them good manners

How often does your child practice the fundamentals of good manners like saying “Thank you” and “Please”? Does she speak politely to people and call the elders “Mr” and “she”? Does she know how to greet people properly and is she familiar with the basics of good table manners? Is she a loser playing a game with friends?

Remember that you are raising someone who will go out into the world and socialize with others for the rest of her life. (And this little person, when he grows up, will be at the dinner table with you and interact with you every day until he leaves the nest.) You can play an important role in shaping behavior. of your child.

Treat them kindly and respect them

The most effective way to get your child to speak to you and to others respectfully and to interact with others in a kind way is to do exactly that yourself when you interact with them. Think about how you talk to your child.

Do you speak harshly when you are unhappy about something? Do you ever scream or say bad things? Consider the way you speak, act and even think, and try to choose a friendly and polite tone and mannerisms with your child, even if you are telling him about a mistake. or misconduct.

Discipline your child consistently

Parents who insist on boundaries or are determined (but loving) to correct bad behavior may actually be harming their children with good intentions. Children without discipline are surprisingly unlikable, selfish, and unhappy children.

Some of the many reasons why we need discipline include the fact that children who are given clear rules, boundaries and expectations are more responsible, independent, able to make choices. choose better and are more likely to make friends and have fun. . As soon as you notice behavioral problems like lying or turning away, handle them with love, understanding, and firmness.

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Teach them to be grateful

Teaching your child how to be grateful and how to express it is an important part of raising a good child. Whether it’s the meal you prepared for dinner or a birthday present from Grandma and Grandpa, teach your child to say thank you. For things like birthday and holiday gifts, make sure your child gets into the habit of writing thank you cards.

Give them responsibility

When children have a tentative list of age-appropriate chores to do at home, such as clearing the table or sweeping the floor, they develop a sense of responsibility and get the job done. Doing a good job and feeling like you’re contributing to the family’s good can make children feel proud of themselves and help them become happier.

Good behavior model

Consider how you interact with others, even when your child isn’t watching. Do you say “Thank you” to the cashier at the market? Do you avoid gossip about neighbors or co-workers? Do you use a friendly tone when talking to waiters? It goes without saying that you directly influence how your children will be. If you want to raise a good child, behave the way you want your child to act.

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